“Many tens of years from now, when I'm finally buried at sea, my Styrofoam tombstone will drift forever, stirred only by the occasional tidal swell or passing whale. The epitaph will read, "Everything was just too damn 'quaint'." Even now, with Bed, Bath, & Beyonds, Pier One Imports, and Martha Stewart boxing up quaintness and delivering it our doorsteps, only Wal-Mart stands as a bulwark, a final ”
