“A confession: I have totally fallen for this Gram Parsons mythology. Indoctrinated by years of biased textbooks, hippies' hyperbolic eulogies, and *Entertainment Weekly* features (a Johnny Knoxville/Christina Applegate biopic currently entitled *Grand Theft Parsons* is due next year), I have venerated Parsons to the point where, back in '91, my Parsons figurine necklace saved my life when I should”
