“A small gasp escaped from between Phillip Straw's endearingly crooked teeth. "Do you really think Pitchfork will like it, sir? Why, where are the extended metaphors?"
"Well, I was going to pretend to be a reviewer from a time before Spiral Scratch who'd been visited by this time-travelling Billie Joe Armstrong replicant."
"Can *we* be your extended metaphor, sir?" piped in diminutive Noel St. Jo”
